The Wicked Smile Stays

So, fate sits in front of me..

A wicked smile on his face.

I look awkwardly,..

My mind drifting in space.

He orders pain on the rocks.

As I look for what I forgot.

He watches me patiently,

As I try to find my destiny.

On the table, I spill the contents of my backpack.

There’s pride, lust and envy.

But I still cant find my destiny.

I stare at him.

A helpless look on my face,

The wicked smile stays.

I tell him I cant find it and plead for his help..

He puts down his drink and knows what to expect.

He leans forward.. Sure of himself.

I come forward to hear what he says,

The wicked smile stays.

I know I’m where I shouldn’t be,

Yet he whispers to me..

“You’ve lost your destiny.”

I close my eyes and begin to cry.

He doesn’t console me,

And he doesn’t want to try.

I break down on the ground.

He smiles.. and orders another round.

For he knows, I’m his to control now.

A mere puppet, waiting for a showdown.

I crawl on my knees,

Hysterical with need.

He knows he’s won,

And yawns, to signify his boredom.

As I get up, taken over by grief,

He points towards his watch, and tells me its time to leave.

As I follow him out regretfully,

He turns back to look at me.

And I see it..

That on his face,

The wicked smile stays.

Complete Acceptance

Things may not be perfect

We may disagree

We may fall out

We may act in ways hurting each other

We may say words upsetting each other

But all that does not matter

All what matter is,

how incomplete we will feel,

without the other one in our lives

The path will never be smooth

We will have to walk

through dark and

through light

But in the end,

to be complete as one,

all what is needed is

An acceptance of all that is, has been, will be and will not be

What we have together is too beautiful ,

to give up on

People search the world,

everywhere looking for what we have

Feeling naturally right for each other

A deeper connection

A genuine care for each other

A complete trust

Same view of moral values seen through the eyes of you and me

Long conversations

From life’s philosophy, moral values

Till the darkest secrets

Humour bonding us like two children laughing together

The lost childhood of ours

You in me

Me in you

As one

No longer mine

I feel empty inside

And a pain as if someone

Was squeezing my heart

Days seem long

Mornings seem meaningless

I hate myself

For having taken the decision

For having putting myself through all this heartache

However then I remind myself

The reason for this

And I know it was the right thing to do

if not for me, then surely for you

I put your life before my love

Today I looked out at the dark night

And related that is exactly how I feel

Dark and empty

A strong desire met me

A desire of wanting to take my life

I feel I have just lost

The only one person

I had waited for all my life

I still have many worthy people in my life

However you were the one who made my day

Now what are the days without you in it

Now what are the nights without you in it

One loss following another

One failure following another

A lone walk

Then I look at my boy

And think that I just have to keep on existing

As I have so often done before

I just have to cos of my god child

You’ll never know how much you meant to me

You will always have a special place in my heart

And it hurts so much to realise that you are no longer mine

The unbearable realisation that tomorrow you will be someone else’s

All dreams crushed

Once again!

Open sky

Whenever I see the sky,
my imaginations begins to fly...
I find patterns in the cloud,
its an elephant, no its a tiger,!! umm!! no no..sometimes I am myself in a doubt..

My imaginations are very wild,
very difficult to be understood by a normal mind,
crazy of some kind,
impossible for my brain to bind..

They hop like frogs inside my brain,
struggling hard to initiate a fantasy drain,
they are the key to the locks,
that opens nothing but untolerable crazy works....

P.S i love you

I am not that available these days,
I have a lots of followings infront of my own ways…
I don’t get time to be in touch with all,
My work today, Is the mere unbreakable wall…

I may not be there to listen to you,
Whenever you want to share…
I may not be there to hold your hands,
Whenever you want me to be there…

I am alone here..yet in the confused crowd…
My soul is quite..yet on the outside, I am loud,
Its not that i no more want to share with you…
Its not that I no more want to care about you…

The hindrances around me are the barrier
To hear about you, I don’t have an apt carrier
My eyes still, just die to look at your pretty face
My ears sill, just die to hear your voice of praise

All I am able to do is…
Every night, leaving all the things behind,
I sit in the corner,and let things in me rewind,
I repeat the episode of our gr8 times,
Sometimes, I pen them down in my rhymes…

And, all I want to say is…
Despite of all the hassles,
I occupy a time dedicatedly
Just to miss you…every night

P.S. I Love You