two sides of me

Please God, will you let my life end

I don't want to live anymore

I haven't got a single friend

And my poor heart is now so sore

Please God, just let my life be done

Because I am feeling so down

Living just isn't any fun

there is no love to be found

Please God, will you soon

call my name Call it real soon,

I am ready I can no longer stand the pain

Living is just too hard for me

I am begging of you my Lord

Please will you let it be my time

I just can't take it anymore

People here treat me so unkind

No one listens to what I say

No one seems to want me around

People seem to turn me away

And it is getting me so down

People here are being so mean

And they always leave me crying

It is like living a bad dream

All my happiness is dying

I don't know why people hate me

I try my best to always please

I try to make them all happy

But it sure doesn't come with ease

My life is feeling so empty

I am feeling so sad and blue

The bad times seem to be plenty

And the good times seem to be few

I don't have anyone to love

All of my happiness is gone

There is nothing left to dream of

So why should I keep living on

Everything is going wrong

Nothing seems to be going right

I don't think I can last that long

I seem to be losing the fight

Why is this happening to me

I really just don't understand

Why is it I am so lonely

God will you please lend me a hand

I am a very lonely boy

I am a really lonely kid

My life is without any joy

God I really wish I was dead

My poor tired heart is so sore

I don't have a tear left to cry

I just can't take it anymore

Please God, will you just let me die

===========================================

Please God, will you let me live

I have so much left to give

Please God, will you spare my soul

I want to grow to be old

Please God, do not let me die

There's so much I want to try

Oh please God,I beg of you

Do not take me,I'm not through

Oh please do not take me now

Please just let me live somehow

I am too young to be dead

I would like to live instead

Oh please God, answer my prayer

This really is just not fair

My life has barely begun

There is so much left undone

It just can not be my time

Please say that it is not mine

There is so much left to do

So now God, I beg of you

I plea to you, and I cry

Please God, do not let me die

My Secret

They always say

you're not of the romantic kind!

How could they ever know that when they are all so blind!

How could they ever decide

When they don't know what is barred in my heart

and what is on my mind?

Why can't they understand?

That I'm so romantic just like the tender white dove

When will they unearth my treasure trove? !

Who will relight my flame?

Who will melt this ice that surrounds me that makes me feel ashamed?

I'm Lost.. I'm all at sea

They can't discover these concealed feelings inside me

They can't find the key

But.. I'll endure these hidden sentiments inside me

These pure feelings.. I'll protect

Until someday.. someone

Will behold my secret! !



life with different covers of destiny

Pages all empty ,

written fate, its not upto us, its destiny dat doesnt wait,

it wont wait for u to open ur eyes, or see wats bare,

it always craves for sumthyn wich is not there,

beauty is plenty, love is true, unfortunately those who see it are only few.

If i were to die tomorrow, could it be destiny ?

I dont know how and i dont know when,

probably when u least expect it then,

imagine a book in hand ,

to write ur life,

When things are what we see them to be,

we percieve them to be happy and free,

no new adventures no accidental smiles,

no 1 to hurt u or hold u for a while,

so take each breathe, every minute, every day,

like an open book written in every way.

time

Time can't take back memories

The sweet success, the bitter tears.

We lived through the growing pains

The anger and the fears.

Good-bye is just another time

We have to face head-on.

If we should stop to relive the past,

The time will soon be gone.

Time is time; it must go on

Although parting is sweet sorrow.

If we're faced with hard times today,

We'll look for better times tomorrow.

So my friend, we must go on

For life's a never ending climb.

When all the world around you stops,

Remember me as time.

The clawn

The audience laugh when you dance and roll

Everybody loves you when you play your role

But do they know you when you´re all alone

When the curtain is down and you´re on your own?

Sure, they adore your smiling face

Your red-painted cheeks and eyebrows raised.

But do they know who`s behind the mask?

Nobody cares...nobody asks..

Nobody`s interested who you are

Without the stage you`re just another guy

Just like thousands walking on the street

Just one of the many faces that they meet.

On center stage, you`ll dance and prance

Giving the best of your last performance.

Oh, the clown is crying, nobody knows

They just want to watch your funny show.

Who will really care just how you feel?

No one will come when your last bell peals.

Oh, the clown is dying, no one can see..

Nobody knows that the CLOWN is...ME..

Destiny or coincidence

Dear Destiny,

It was you, who first told me that 'if ever I were to sit beside you, you could not talk for hours and we could have the best conversation ever.' It was you who talked of darkness, and of love, conjuring a slide of subtle sweet words that I sipped down, mesmerized with the wondrous possibility of having someone fall into me. It was you who created a changed man who was capable of love. But with that, came a changed man who could now feel pain and be afraid. It was you who created my destiny.

You talked of your desire to be loved, and to love, how you needed someone to need you. I felt I was destined to fulfill that desire but you never really believed in destiny. You wanted me to stretch my arms towards you but you wanted me to understand when you suddenly needed to withdraw into yourself, into your shell of broken dreams. I was so preoccupied in wiping off your tears that I never noticed the ones in my eyes. Slowly the tears dried out and I fell asleep in the dark. I never really understood the meaning of wiping off my own tears.

You talked of being too scared to commit, not realizing that every time you kissed my face, told me that you missed me, that you longed for my arms around you, and every time you talked of us together, you made a commitment. It was a promise that my heart swallowed up and sent pulsing through every vain in my body. But still, the closer I tried to get to you, the further away you seemed - an irony I was not able to understand. Wasn't this what you wanted, what you needed?

You asked me what no woman who believes in coincidences should ask of a man; to love you unconditionally, to dream with you, to "trust" you. Despite the many conditions that sprang up, the dreams that kept breaking, and the many reasons that made trust seem futile, I gave you what you asked for. I was so obsessed with trying to fix you that I didn't realize that I was slowly becoming unfixable. I didn't know that I was not supposed to fix you, someone else was, or were. I wasn't your destiny after all, just a coincidence in a string of coincidences. I wonder if I was ever able to make you a believer or just make you even think about it? Then I wonder why I became a believer in destiny myself? Was it because of you, because you were my destiny or were you my coincidence too?

If indeed you were just a coincidence, then all of it meant nothing and I shouldn't really care because more coincidences will come along, and I'll start all over again. The damage would be fixable and I would eventually find my destiny. But what if you weren't a coincidence? This thought haunts me all the time. If you really were my destiny, then that means I'll be unfixable forever. How and when am I supposed to know? Time will tell? I haven't heard time speak for so long that I doubt if it even has a voice. Maybe till the day I find out, I'll assume you were my destiny because even though that would mean I'll be unfixable, it would also mean that all of it had a meaning, a purpose. My love was not in vain.

Love,

Me, Unfixable